This and that ....
Happiness is always in reach
Good morning beautiful people,
Today, I will be get at least some information on the transition from Augusta (GI) to Nashville (transplant).
Here are more details on where we stand....
-- The tumor is about four centimeters at last sighting and of course growing.
-- It has picked up residence in a liver that was over 50% dead scar tissue brought on by the cirrhosis which was brought on by the, still main culprit, Hep C and an over the top rock and roll lifestyle that had a run of about 25 years. While the lifestyle is gone (the RR part has attached itself to my soul and well, it isn't leaving) the Hep C remained, but we did know this until the past six weeks or so.
The will not attempt to clear the Hep C due to the overall condition of the liver, but they will as part of the new liver, etc.
The fact that the tumor is in largely dead tissue is good since it could slow the growth. However, it still grows, and it could spread, and there is the continued assault of the Hep C.
So, it is a race between transplant and the various antagonists. That is why days like today are important. We need to get the ball rolling on the transplant side as the other side is doing its thing unimpeded.
At this point, my only really big concern (of course there are others, but I have to manage what I allow to bother me that I can not change, and that is very little) is after transplant. It will remove the cancer, and there is always the chance is spreads, we will deal with that should it happen. However, the high powered, very addictive, opiods that they will want me to take scare the crap out of me. I don't want in my life again, at all. I would choose the pain if it were pain that I could actually deal with, but I doubt I can manage that pain emotionally for a month or six weeks.
I really am at a loss for that part of the process. I once told myself that I would rather die than become an active drinker again. I don't want to die certainly, but I still believe what I said, and I know there is an answer for me out there. It may be illegal in my state, or nation, but that does not concern me. What concerns me is ever feeling a craving again, because that is the lowest pit in hell.